There are two ways to live life; either sit back and let what is happening run its course or take the charge in your hands and try to change it. The choice is ours.
We can learn to cook, dance, paint, sing etc. we can learn different languages. But can a person acquire the skills to be optimistic and jolly? If yes then what impacts will it have on their life?
Optimism is a choice. Would you make it?
The answer lies in a study conducted by Martin Seligman. According to him, people can learn to be hopeful and optimistic. It is a very contrasting topic to that of learned helplessness. Seligman, while experimenting on learned helplessness, discovered that some people resisted the helplessness conditioning. Those are optimists. Remember that optimism is not about being oblivious to the problems. That is called denial. Optimism refers to fighting and positively facing problems.
What are some characteristics of optimists?
- These people avoid blaming themselves in the face of adversity. Unlike pessimists, optimists tend to believe that good things happen.
- They tend to believe that problems are temporary and they take it up as a challenge to improve and be a better version of themselves.
- Optimists tend to blame the external environment or factors and not on themselves. On the other hand, when they face success, they link it to their efforts.
- When they fail in one area, optimists do not let it affect the other areas. They tend to limit the failure to that particular area and try to improve in it.
It is easy to be happy when things are the way you want but what about when they are not?
The real art is in being happy even when things are not the way you had planned them to be? The key to being optimistic is to avoid negative self-talk and replacing pessimistic thoughts with optimistic thoughts. In the face of adversity, one needs to talk themselves out of it. It is important to be open to fun and humour even when facing adversity. It keeps the light-heartedness alive. One should never be ashamed of their problems. Always accept the situation as it is and try to talk to someone about it. Many a time, after sharing, the intensity of the situation inside us reduces and we feel light.
ABCDE Model
Seligman proposed the ABCDE model of optimism.
- A stands for adversity. It is the situation that has created problems, discomforts or failures in any domain of your life.
- B stands for Belief or the way one interprets the situation. This is the way one feels about the adverse situation.
- C stands for Consequences i.e. the way one reacts or feels about the situation.
- D stands for Disputation or the extent to which we argue to dispute the belief. One can think of examples that can challenge the beliefs.
- E stands for Energization or the way disputing one’s beliefs makes them feel.
We have to keep this in mind that this is a gradual process. The change is not going to take place overnight. These changes will happen slowly. The importance should be given to practising these changes. It is important to remind yourself to not think negatively. And change those negative thoughts into positive.
Benefits of staying positive!
“Optimism is invaluable for a meaningful life. With a firm belief in a positive future you can throw yourself into the service of that which is larger than you are” – Martin Seligman
- Optimism leads to better and healthier mental health. Research has proved that learning to stay positive reduced the chances of facing depression.
- Optimists tend to be more successful in life since they have high resilience and the will to fight back.
- Optimistic people tend to be higher on motivation. In a challenging situation, pessimists might give up halfway but the hope and positivity in optimists keep them going. Even when they fail and fall they never stop running.
- People high on optimism tend to be less stressful. Their resilience is high and they bounce back very quickly from the failures.
- Since the stress levels are low, optimists tend to have positive physical health. They are less prone to hypertension, diabetes, cancer etc.
- And based on the points mentioned above, we can say that optimists live longer!
It’s a choice and we all should choose to be positive because as correctly said by Helen Keller “No pessimist ever discovered the secrets of the stars, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new heaven to the human spirit.”
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