Why are you yelling at me?
Can’t you handle the situation with patience?
I hate her for her aggressive behavior
Have you anytime come across these situations where you had to hear the above questions and comments?
How many of you tried to control your anger?
I have noticed people saying this –
“I know anger is not a good emotion but I am unable to control it”
“I feel helpless”
A few of you might also feel sorry and feel ashamed for venting out your anger at the moment.
People might often label you as an “angry bird”, “insane” and with many more different names.
These are the moments when you get triggered
When you have work pressure.
When you are not satisfied with the way of life.
When people purposely trying to provoke you.
When you feel that your colleague is irritating you.
Anger affects your mental health as your mind gets disturbed and you feel guilty about it, and when you feel guilty about it you start overthinking about it, and eventually, you will feel stressed. For having a happy mind it’s important to cope up with anger. In this over-scheduled life, we often get irritated and frustrated because of the situations that we are suppose to encounter.
I have often seen people not having healthy relationships with their relatives, friends, and colleagues because they fail to be polite while they speak due to their anger issues.
These people might be right sometimes but because they fail to put their views in better words, others don’t like them and don’t even make an effort to understand their views. So this might often put them in trouble.
Does aggression solve your problems?
Does shouting at someone helps you to maintain healthy relationships with them?
I feel aggression will only double our problems.
Just think about it.
I have seen people being aggressive on minor issues. These people often have a disturbed life. Peace just vanishes from their life. I often find these people in trouble.
Have you come across any of your friends or relatives who are dealing with aggression and are unable to cope with it?
I am sure most of you might have come across these types of people.
Did you try to help them?
Or advised them on the ways to cope up with aggression?
I have come across many people in my life who were dealing with anger issues and here are the few tips that they followed in order to cope up with aggression.
So here are a few basic tips that I would like to share with you so that you can cope up with aggression.
Think before you vocalize:
Sometimes you might not be liking the situation you are in or sometimes you might be under pressure, especially in these situations you might utter those words that you are not supposed to but you just utter in the heat of the moment and then realize and regret. So think for at least three seconds before you say something. Doing this will help you not to regret it. When I was in my intermediate I had a friend who was aggressive, and she started practicing this technique. It helped her and I hope it also helps you.
Take a break:
When you feel that the situation is frustrating and you can’t handle it anymore take a break. For instance, you are loaded with lots of work and you have been working on it for several hours and still, if the work seems like never-ending and this is leading you to irritation, anger, and frustration, take a break, as in go and have a nice cup of coffee, or else go and have your favorite food and enjoy the moment. Doing this will help you to get rid of your frustration and will help you to have a happy mind. Doing this just recharges your mind reduces your anger.
Deviate your mind:
When you anticipate that a situation might put you in trouble, as in, it might make you aggressive either avoid it or else deviate your mind. For instance, when you are served a dish that you don’t like to eat, a few of you might get frustrated looking at the dish. So in this situation rather than yelling at the person who served you the dish, you can avoid eating the dish by being polite to them, or else when you are compelled to eat it you can think of your own favorite dish or think about the good memories that you had before. so this will deviate your mind. This was also one of those techniques that were followed by my friend when she was in intermediate so as to control her anger.
Analyze and realize:
I think this is the basic step that you need to follow and understand. When you shout at a person for something wrong that has happened or when you get frustrated and use abusive language, just think doing all this benefit you in any way?
Is it making you a better person?
Are you gaining respect at your workplace doing all this?
Just think about it. Realize that doing all this is not helping you in any way and when you realize this,
Just think about how better the situation could have been handled so that you will not repeat it again when you are unfortunately again into that situation.
Appreciate yourself:
When you tried to control your anger and when you were successful in it, appreciate yourself. It makes you feel good and boosts your confidence and will also motivate you to continue to control your anger. You might feel it silly when you read this but trust me it helps.
Ask for help:
If you feel that you are unable to handle it by yourself and want help. Consult a psychologist. Booking an appointment and having a few sessions with a psychologist can help you to cope up with aggression. A psychologist can definitely help you by providing you with pertinent ways to cope up with aggression.
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