Faults, flaws, failure, defects, imperfections, weaknesses, etc. – we have heard these words regularly in some or the other forms. These are the words, qualities, or expressions which are highly unwanted by most of the people. Flaws are not at all accepted by anyone. But who understands the meaning of imperfection and perfection completely? Who invented these words? Why have other people’s perspectives started to matter so much? If you are not worthy or pleasing to someone, but if that is the way of life, then you are absolutely right!
Because it is YOU, who decides whether it’s an imperfection or not.
The reality, which remains unchanged and considered to be one of the great things in life, is all of us are flawed. Acknowledging and accepting your shortcomings will make you brave. This thing is to be learned by adolescents as they are primarily affected by the consequences. Many of us still think and even teach that in order to survive in this world, you need to acquire perfection.
Every individual on this globe desires to make things perfect and spend years and years trying to fit into society, leaving behind the comforts, joys, and pleasures of life. Perfection can be notable in numerous ways, but striving continuously for it should not be the aim. To be perfect means to be in control and unreal. Thus, eventually, you will lose your freedom, which may, at times, bring disappointments and frustration.
Acquiring Perfectionism or being the best is a significant concern in everyone’s life. Psychologically, Perfection is a personality trait in which one strives for excellence, does things better than others, maintains a higher standard of living, and refrains from accepting anything other than perfection.
We have read or heard that Perfection is a myth or a trait, and like most other personality traits, it has the right side and the wrong side. The good side can be termed Adaptive Perfectionism, and the bad term is referred to as Maladaptive Perfectionism. Adaptive Perfectionist is the one who sets higher standards yet accept and recognize their limitations to achieve them. While in Maladaptive Perfectionism, one does not understand the limitations. Thus, Adaptive perfectionism is considered to be healthy.
Research suggests that “The perfectionism traits can be passed down to our kids.” Adolescents are forced by parents to always achieve higher and feel the pressure as they grow up. When their efforts do not result in perfection, the expression and feelings of disapproval can be observed as abusive.
Usually, it is believed that the idea of being flawless brings a very high level of stress and anxiety. Competition is seen everywhere around. People even develop insecurities and self-doubts. These self-doubts ultimately result in questioning one’s own potential and gradual degradation of an individual.
The flaws are a part of you. Understand that these flaws make you perfect. If you are flawless, then you are not perfect. Your life is comprehensive and complete because of all the physical and mental scars.
Physical imperfections
We are majorly ashamed of our own bodily structures such as childhood injury marks, being over or underweight, dark or fair skin, etc. we keep comparing ourselves with others and even judge ourselves because of the increasing insecurities. We find our physical attributes as flawed rather than exceptional. Accepting and embracing our specialty brings a considerable change in our lives and gives us strength and balance. Choose to be authentic and real in life as this authenticity is indeed far more charismatic.
Psychological Imperfections
It takes one terrible and upsetting event, which changes our outlook in life. These incidents often leave deep scars on our minds that we become incredibly insecure and tend to seclude ourselves. Running away and hiding these incidents will do no good to you. Opening-up to the therapist can help you get out of this maze quickly.
We all have things that are about ourselves which we like and dislike. That is completely fine. What’s not okay is letting the things we dislike or disapprove affect us or our personality severely. The real challenge lies in balancing positivity with negativity and securing a positive image. Trusting and appreciating your own self will attract other people to do the same.
If there is something that unites us in humanity, it is our imperfections and flaws. All of us have them in some or the other form. All we have to do is acknowledge them in a healthy way and ensure that we see them differently but also, we do not let them hold us back. The profound truth is that sometimes the traits we believe to be our flaws can turn out to be our strength and power at the right circumstances, and we may just perceive these flaws as the most valuable part of our life.
“Imperfection is not our personal problem; it is a natural part of existing.” – Tara Brach
Note: If you liked this article, you may also enjoy reading Embracing Flaws
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Show comments Hide comments[…] interactions or a companion, in order to evade their solitude or fear of loneliness. Furthermore, perfectionism is indispensable to workaholics. Thus, they experience difficulty in delegating tasks to people as […]