“Empathy grounds me and centres me”
Satya Nadella
Helen Keller once said, ‘The best and the most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. It must be felt with heart’
We are emotional creature who often make decisions and respond to stimuli based on our emotions.
Our emotions are a maze for us. There are too many and every small moment gives rise to one or the other emotion. While solving such puzzles, there came out few leaders who could control their emotions and not letting them take over the bigger things.
These people are the leaders who are emotionally intelligent. But what is emotional intelligence and how does having it make them different from the rest?
Emotional Intelligence is the capability to monitor and recognize one’s own emotions and those of others, to discern/discriminate between different emotions and labelling them appropriately and to use the emotional information to guide thinking and behaviour and to manage and adjust them.
Before I tell you more about it, I’ll give you examples. I am sure all of us are familiar with Satya Nadella (CEO, Microsoft) and Elon Musk (I am sure all of us know him ever since he gave his baby the most unique name one would ever hear)
So what are the traits of such emotionally intelligent leaders? (cause we sure do want to learn, be inspired and try to be a little like them, right?)
- Empathy:
Empathy is the capacity to understand or feel what another person is experiencing from within their frame of reference i.e., the capacity to place oneself in another’s position. Empathy is that quality of stepping out from one’s own emotions and seeing it from the perspective of someone else. It is the characteristic that has the ability to change the world. A leader must have the ability to relate to others, to show compassion and to take the time to help someone. They provide strategies for self-improvement and go a little above by not just saying what to do but also connecting with someone on emotional level and understanding them. This trait more often shows a level of sincerity and also helps forge new relationships. They are able to cope with things that are outside their control.
- Self-Awareness and Motivation
Before the stair of understanding others is the stair of understanding oneself. To recognize what one is feeling, the stimuli one is facing and to prepare oneself in managing the emotions both in proactive and reactive manner. It is how one sees themselves and perceive others to see them as. It is knowing one’s own strength and weakness and accepting them accordingly. One acts more realistically and are open to constructive criticism. One knows which situation is in their hands and which brings out the worst in them.
- Curiosity
When one is curious they are more passionate. Curiosity leads to a strive for learning and growth. It drives one to know everything they possibly can and try to be one of the best. A curious mind is always a growing mind.
- Analytical
Most leaders are deep thinkers who analyse and process all the new information that comes their way. It’s an on-going process and a leader never stops analysing both the old and new information. An analytical mind constantly and consciously focuses on a better mind-set, being open to new ideas and analysing the existence of ‘why’.
- Assertiveness
Temper is an often tested and the quality of being self-controlled and confident without being aggressive is necessary. There is a difference between hearing and listening and a leader actively listens and comprehends what someone is telling them. Conflict in unavoidable and an EI Leader resolves the conflict rather than leading it to a negative consequence or running away from the conflict.
- Optimism
When one is happy, when their mind set and moods are positive, they are smarter and motivated and thus more successful. Of all the things they control and influence, attitude is the primary thing that is always within control. Optimism leads to a much better quality of approach.
- Adaptability
Adaptability is not an imitation. It is means of power, resistance and assimilation. EI leaders recognize the course of their way and know when it’s time to change. It is vitally important to recognize and be able to make quick decisions in best interest during times of change. When on strategy is not working they try and take another one quickly without negatively focusing on the previous one.
- Focus
Focus leads to successful achievements. Focus not only means tending towards the goals but it also means working for a today and tomorrow and not dwelling on the past. One should learn from their mistakes but what’s done in the past should be left in the past.
- Transparency
Communication is very important. As well as honesty. Being honest makes people count on you. A leader must be visible, answering questions and concerns and in calming fears. Only when the world knows your work with honesty is when you succeed.
- Balanced
It is necessary to have work-life balance. To sort out the priorities and giving equal and proper attention to both. When one overpowers the other, there is imbalance.
These traits are not subjective and can be changed or modified. But EI is what makes one different from the rest.
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